ÿþvar msg = new Array(); 

insert = new Date(); 

today = insert.getDate(); 

msg[0]="In the days of old the gods had the whole earth distributed among them by allotment. There was no quarrelling; for you cannot rightly suppose that the gods did not know what was proper for each of them to have, or, knowing this, that they would seek to procure for themselves by contention that which more properly belonged to others."

msg[1]="The brand manager from Creative tore open a cellophane bag, 69 cents retail, and dumped the contents over a billboard proposal. &#8220;Just a little something the guys in R&D thought you could get a handle on, Linda&#8212;a low cholesterol fried pork rind product, the latest scientific breakthrough.&#8221; The Pork-A-Dillos were uniform tiny curls like the tops of Dairy Queen soft ice cream cones.<br>&#8220;Curvature of the swine. Very evocative, Sid.&#8221;" 

msg[2]="They took such delight in the killing, horn tips dipped crimson in the blood of a careless bull-dancer&#8212;then forgot me at the end. I should rather have my own snowplow or a little red truck." 

msg[3]="I am god here. None but the lunatic fringe question my actions&#8212;a life-long immersion in the articles of faith makes them most amenable. They've been waiting for me. Besides, this is a serendipitous location, convenient to subways, buses and the Pennsylvania Railroad." 

msg[4]="Cousteau&#8217;s mom named him after a TV show she was watching during her confinement, The Undersea World of Jacques Cousteau. Respect for his namesake had him keep fish fry Fridays at the diner long after Vatican II&#8212;Cousteau was more a poet than a cook."

msg[5]="I would remind you that in my hands this basketball is a dangerous weapon. One false move and it&#8217;s stand and deliver. Remember always you are guests in the tents of my people."

msg[6]="They said Einstein was crazy and he discovered relativity. And then they said Harry Pease was crazy. And, sure enough, Harry was." 

msg[7]="I am a refugee. I claim political asylum. Could you show me the way to the men s room please?" 

msg[8]="There are three ways to get anywhere&#8212;the way you know, the way someone has told you and the way that is intuited for you. I am already here, so that leaves two." 

msg[9]="We live on the bow wave of perceived time. Time is a comforting figment, a subjective place humans have dreamed up to give superficial meaning to their paltry lives. Everything is all there and a glorious moment it was. We can never live it at once. We are merely writing its catalog as it unfolds. Merrily we roll along."

msg[10]="My associate is a poet. You will please notice that he is armed and while my attention may waver during our chat, his does not." 

msg[11]="The Manticore bared its fangs. &#8220;It is simply wonderful to see you again, Morgana, though it seems like ages since you have graced our humble pit with pit with your radiance.&#8221; It threw its head back, as far back as the ruff of quills that ringed its head allowed, and racketed gales of laughter."

msg[12]="&#8220;I brought into my exile an ivory image of myself sixty cubits high. I have always been fond of its fierce golden gaze and fabled thousand breasts&#8212;an allegory of nurture.&#8221; She turned coyly to give the child a poke with her middle finger. &#8220;It bankrupted a satrapy in Asia Minor.&#8221;" 

msg[13]="You&#8212;the very same Queen Rhea who coupled with a serpent to produce the Egg of the World&#8212;have a question for us, your humble artifacts? Ask on, then, Beautiful One, but question warily. We will never lie to you, but answers flow freely when all we want is to see the sky again." 

msg[14]="From the clustered heads a gargoyle&#8217;s tongue thrust into the corridor at ankle height, a peril to trip the unwary. Its dead eyes were rolled back, hollow stone pupils positioned to stare up the kilt of any passing visitor. In former times it had been out-of-doors and its gaze had been heavenward, away from the temptations of the earth and the flesh&#8212;an allegorical figure. It had been a long time between entertainments."

msg[15]="&#8220;I am an abundantly married man with a happy home life, but I never tire of watching Harriet wait tables. A consummate balletic performance, the Roller Derby in sensible shoes&#8212;stick a strobe on her ass and you&#8217;d get perfect lazy-eights.&#8221;" 

msg[16]="I should have rightly asked if you knew any Catalan, but nobody does these days, so I don t ask. Spanish is better than French for getting by, though French is better than nothing. The lingo here is Occitan, Old Provençal. At least as far as the middle of yon wheat field. After that the Fata Morgana deals as she pleases." 

msg[17]="The Cow seemed to weep. &#8220;Why don t I have a name?&#8221;<br>&#8220;If you required one; there are names for cats&#8212;naming cats is a popular pastime where they have backyard gardens: Catalepsis, Catatonia, Catapult. You, alas, are only a miraculous statue.&#8221;" 

msg[18]="Words talk to words, nothing grander. It is safe within a discipline, think you? Dreams are about dreams but they can lure you in, even as music explains nothing even as it makes you a part of it, a slippery pole to nowhere. Art practices us." 

msg[19]="A goddess&#8212;reclining on a cloud with her socks off, reclining with a beer and portioning out the conclusions of destiny? Up all night with binoculars watching minks mating on the golf course is more like it. They have forgotten me, a lint in the navel of nowhere."

msg[20]="Brocaded silks and perfumed beards&#8212;braided and pointed with oil of citron and patchouli to lure a lady&#8217;s favor&#8212;shaved heads with plaited topknots twined with ribbons, pointy-toed slippers glided over floors of polished finely-veined adamantine. Cytharae thrummed tempi of seduction and the great drums thumped out a meter concocted to please a drowsy libido." 

msg[21]="I hitched a ride with the Happy Time Bread man. I didn&#8217;t volunteer and he didn&#8217;t ask." 

msg[22]="Generations of private schemes and public neglect had drained the area, left it bottomed out. The shriveling touch of government programs was still felt, albeit infrequently. This was the source of no small local pride. The Willipaqers figured what with things so bad now, tomorrow was a shoo-in." 

msg[23]="Suppose I am a county magistrate and Libby comes before my bench with a brace of suits averring that her brother is entertaining space aliens. The conventional wisdom is that, lucid moments notwithstanding, crazy people are crazy all the time." 

msg[24]="A pearlescent drop formed at the end of his sting shimmering and amorphous, like a soap bubble in the sun. A spasm of panic rippled down the length of his body. His first thought was to get away, but the tail followed." 

msg[25]="Recall how the John the Baptist&#8212;the patron saint of press agents finished up his assignment? The Baptist was beheaded. I still have two years left to pay on my car." 

msg[26]="&#8220;Freeze!&#8221; Harriet was on her hands and knees, slapping at the floor. &#8220;Don t anybody move!&#8221;" 

msg[27]="Ah yes, your death&#8212;I have something deliciously modern and psychopathic planned for you, Harry. Like chopping you into teensy-weensy bits and flushing you out to sea. Pardon me for being brusque, for these are my little ways." 

msg[28]="&#8220;We have our own priorities, and they do not include you. Our rhythms are not yours; you are not of this world&#8212;an Earth Mother of another dispensation. And what does an earth need with a mother anyway?&#8221; He stamped the ground with his heel. &#8220;Poor old duffer, got no Mum then, eh?&#8221;" 

msg[29]="&#8220;Desire is an honest emotion. Never be ashamed of it,&#8221; Morgana had told him. &#8220;The glands never lie. Furthermore, you are my chick that I have hatched from the egg of the world we both stand on.&#8221; Biff felt warm, reassured and comforted when she said the words." 

msg[30]="The idea of missing out on Tom&#8217;s boil-in-a-bag frozen Szechwan dumplings made her disproportionately cheery at her impending death." 

document.write(msg[today-1]);